JOKES PE JOKES: 2017

Funny Jokes

Our main aim is to create fun among our visitors. Thats why we have started most demanding page

FUNNY JOKES in HINDI

on this blog. This page is a mixture of every type of Jokes like HINDI JOKES, SANTA BANTA JOKES ETC. So read these jokes, share and just creat fun. Happy Fun.

एक प्यार करने वाले जोड़े ने
आत्महत्या करने की सोची,
.
.
.

. लड़का पहले कूद गया,
लड़की ने आँख बंद कर ली,
और लौटने लगी,
.
.
. .
लड़के ने हवा में पैराशूट खोला और
चिल्लाया :
पता था साली चुड़ैल... तू नही
कूदेगी !
. .
बस उसी दिन से लोगों ने"लेडीज
फर्स्ट"

कहना शुरू कर दिया..
:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

Santa at petrol pump
Bhai 1rs ka petrol dal do.
Salesman: Bhai itna sara petrol
dalva ke kahan jana hai?
Santa: Jana kahan hai hum
to aise hi paise udaate hain!!

Maa beti se: Beti doodh ka glass pee lo
Beti:No mama
mujhe nai peena.
Maa: Beti agar doodh nahi
piyogi to badi kaise hogi?
Beti: maa apko bhi toh doodh pasand nahi,
phir bhi aap badi ho gai hain
Main bhi nahi piyungi
to badi ho jaungi.
Maa: Achi bachiyan zid nahi
karti,
Agar meri achi beti ho
to doodh pee lo
warna mei tum se khafa
ho jaungi.
Beti: OK mama,.
aap kehti hain toh mein doodh pee leti hoon . .
Aur is tarah us ki beti ne doodh pee liya..
Msg end tak kitnay gaur se padha hai
ki kab non veg start hoga..
bus karo darindo
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A Punjabi Couple Goes To England
There at Hotel
Punjabi to Waiter:- Sir, Most respectfully I beg to say that I am ill & can't come to school
Kindly Grant Me Tea  For 2 Please
Waiter is Surprised  But Understnds & Brings Tea 
Wife:- Wah ji, Tawanu Te Fur Fur English Auandi Ae
Husband:- Halley Te Main Paani Waastey Thirsty Crow Nai Sunaai 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ek ladka aur ladki hotel mein gaye.
Waiter: Kya loge?
Ladki: Sabziyoo waali roti dena.
Waiter: What?
Ladka: Gaon ki hai, PIZZA maang rahi hai.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wife = Where R u.?
Husband = I'm At "Bank".
Wife = Wow thats good I need 20,000 For new Cell Phone ,5,000 for new dress , 6000 for new shoes, 4000 for new purse, 5000 for my new cosmetics
Husband = Sorry ,
I mean
I am at Blood bank
"KHOON PIYEGI
KHOON ?"

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Girls vs Boys Jokes

JOKES KN GIRLS
JOKES ON BOYS

Definition of Marketing, Advertising, Telemarketing & Customer Feedback
You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, “I am very rich. Marry me!” That’s Direct Marketing. You’re at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says, “He’s very rich. Marry him.” That’s Advertising. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day you call and say, “Hi, I’m very rich. Marry me.” That’s Telemarketing. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, “I’m rich. Marry me” She gives you a nice hard slap on your face. That’s Customer Feedback .
Technically there are 7 TYPES OF LADIES- 1. HARD DISK lady : Remembers everything forever 2. RAM lady : Forgets about you the moment you turn off. 3. SCREENSAVER lady : just for looking 4. INTERNET lady : Difficult to access 5. SERVER lady : Always busy when needed 6. MULTIMEDIA lady : Looks beautiful but you can only look. 7. VIRUS lady : This type of lady is normally called 'WIFE', once enters your system, never leaves even if the system is formatted.  Boy: Boys are always more intelligent than girls
Girl: Any proof?
Boy: We always say intelliGENTS, have u ever heard telling intelliLADIES..??;-)

Teacher & Students Jokes

1. Teacher:"This is the fifth time this week that i have had punish you What do you have to say?
Student: "Thank god Saterday and Sunday are holidays, Sir!"

2. Small boy: "Dad , can you write in the dark?"
Father: "I think so. What is it you want me to write?"
Small Boy: "Your name on the report card."

3. Teacher: "How do you like your new house?"
Student: "Oh, we like it very much. I have a room of my own, each of my sisters has a room of her own. But poor Mum, she's still in with Dad."

4. Son: "Daddy, why did you put your thumb impression on my progress report instead of your signature?"

Father: "I don't want your teacher to think that anyone with your marks could possibly have a father who can read or write."

5. PAPPU : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
FATHER : No. Why do you ask that?
PAPPU: Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?

6. Child: "Why do you send me to school for."
Mother: "To make a man out of you."
Child: "But my teacher makes everyday a cock out of me."

7. Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?"
Pupil : "The moon".
Teacher : "Why?"
Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it".

8. One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"

9. TEACHER: what is the different between problem and challenge????
STUDENT:3boys+1girl=problem
1boy+3girls=challenge..

Non Stop Laughing with Short SMS Joke

Today's Jokes....

**********************************************************
मांग भरने की सजा कुछ इस कदर पा रहा हूँ
की मांग पूरी करते-करते, अब मांग-मांग के खा रहा हूँ...!!!

***********************************************************

पापा: बेटी, बड़ी हो के क्या करोगी?
बेटी: शादी...
पापा: गलत बात है... अभी से किसी का बुरा नहीं सोचते...!

***********************************************************

पति ने पान खरीद के पत्नी को खाने के लिए दिया.
पत्नी: अरे... आप ने तो अपने लिए लिया ही नहीं..!
पति: में तो ऐसे ही खामोश रह सकता हूँ...!

***********************************************************

बीवी क्या होती है?
बीवी भगवन के प्रसाद जैसे होती है,
जिसमे चाहते हुए भी कोई नुक्स नहीं निकाल सकते;
श्रद्धा और मज़बूरी के साथ चुपचाप खाए जाओ...!

***********************************************************

पत्नी: मैंने सुना है की स्वर्ग में पुरुषो को अप्सराए मिलती है.. औरतो को क्या मिलता है?
पति: कुछ नहीं; उपरवाला सिर्फ दुखी लोगो की ही सुनता है..!

***********************************************************

पत्नी: मैंने सुना है की स्वर्ग में पति-पत्नी को साथ में रहेने नहीं देते...
पति: पगली, तभी तो उसे स्वर्ग कहेते है.!

***********************************************************

मतदान करने के लिए उम्र 18 साल, और शादी के लिए 21 साल... ऐसा क्यू?
क्यू की, सरकार जानती है, की
बीवी संभालना, वो मुल्क सँभालने ज्यादा मुश्किल है...!

***********************************************************

FRIEND is- Asian Paints = जो दुनिया बदल दे...
GIRLFRIEND is- Everest Masala = जो टेस्ट में बेस्ट...
WIFE is-- Mosquito Coil = जो कोने-कोने से ढूंढ के मारे !

***********************************************************

ज़िन्दगी के शुरुआत "S" से होती है:
S से सूरज, सुबह, शाम, समय,....
उसके बाद: S से सगाई, शादी, फिर सांस, ससुर, साला, साली,
और फिर सत्यiनाश...!

***********************************************************

पति: डार्लिंग, तुम खूबसूरत होती जा रही हो...
पत्नी (खुश हो कर, रसोईघर में से): तुमने कैसे जाना?y
पति: तुम्हे देख कर रोटियां भी जलने लगी है...

***********************************************************

किसी को उसके फटे हुए जूते, मैले कपडे, पुरानी घडी, उतरा हुआ मुंह,.... इत्यादि चीजो से उसे गरीब ना मानो....
हो सकता है, की वो आदमी शादीशुदा हो.

***********************************************************

Doctors Jokes

Doctors Jokes are here.

_________________________________________________________________________

___________________________________________________________________________

TEXT MESSAGES

1. पप्पू की माँ की तबियत ख़राब हो गई तो डॉक्टर ने कहा के माँ के २ टेस्ट होंगे
पप्पू ये सुन कर ज़ोर ज़ोर से रोने लगा और कहता
कि हे भगवान अब क्या होगा मेरी माँ तो अनपढ़ है.

😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆

1. Mareez: Docter Sab, mujhe bhool janey ki bemari hai

Doctor: Aap ko ye bemari kab se hai?

Mareez: Konsi bemari. . ."(':')''

___________________________________________________________________________

2. Doctor mariz k piche bhag raha tha logo ne pocha kya hwa
Doctor
4 bar esa hwa hai sala dimagh ka oparation karwany ata hai or BAAL katwa k bhag jata hai

___________________________________________________________________________

3. Doctor ki shadi Nurse sy ho gai,
Dost ny Doctor sy poocha: suna yar,
kaisi life chal rhi hy?
Doctor:Yar kya kahon jab tk Sister na kahon sunti hi nhi.

___________________________________________________________________________

4. Mareez DocTor Se > DocT Sahab Mujhe Duur Ka Nazar Nhi AaTa..

DocT > Wo Asmaan Par Kia Hai?

Mareez > Chand..

DocT > Abey SaaLe Is Se Duur Kia FarishTe DeKhe Ga..!

___________________________________________________________________________

5. Gareeb mariz: Dr.mere paas paise nahi hain,
ap mera elaaj kar dein to kabhi apke kaam aunga

Dr: kya kaam karte ho?

Mariz: qabar khodta ho.

___________________________________________________________________________

6. Doctor : Aab tabiyat kaisi hai?
Santa : Pehle se jyada kharab hai.
Doctor : Dawai khali thi?
Santa : Nahi dawai ki sishi to bhari hui thi.
Doctor : I mean dawai le li thi?
Santa : Ji aapne di to meine le li thi.
Doctor : Bewkoof dawai pee li thi?
Santa : Nahi dawai to laal thi.
Doctor : Abe gadhe dawai ko pee liya tha?
Santa : Nahi sir peelia to mujhe tha!!!